I grew up in a time when self-love was something bad, a sin.
It was wrongly labelled as egoism and many people tried to avoid it like the plague.
That avoidance had been the cause of many common problems we have to deal with nowadays.
“Do not think about yourself first”, “Being egotistical will send you straight to hell”, “If you weren´t so self-centred, this wouldn´t have happened to you”, “Nobody will love you if you don´t stop caring only about yourself”. These were common phrases I heard as I grew up. (Actually it wasn´t that long ago, I am talking of only two decades more or less)
Time has passed and taught us that loving yourself and being your first priority is not an evil attitude. It is of highest importance if you want to really grow and enhance at all levels.
We seem to finally start getting the lesson, and you can hear more often people telling you: “You have to love yourself more.” “Why don’t you love yourself?” “If you only loved yourself, this wouldn’t have happened to you.” “You can’t love another person until you love yourself first.”
But we are the masters of falling in extremes, and either we hate ourselves or we centre the universe around our own world.
Remember, Buddha talked about the Lam Rim (The middle path). He saw once a sitar master with his young student in a boat. The student was tuning the strings of the sitar, the teacher told him: if you tense the string too much it will snap and if you make it too lose, it will not make a sound. You need to find the perfect tension until you reach the sound you need.
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