The pain in change

Have you noticed that when facing new circumstances, new situations like a new job, moving to a new house, a new relationship, etc. We react in many different ways?

Fear is the first feeling to jump into our heart. And sometimes that fear is the main reason because we reject change so much.

And it is understandable since change could be a very traumatic experience at first.

I remember when I was a child to be afraid of jumping into a swimming pool because my memory of the first contact with water at a different temperature was not very enjoyable.  It took me a long time to slowly crawl into the pool and it was not a very pleasant event.

Of course once this “traumatic” experience was passed it was almost impossible to take me out of the pool, but to “convince” me to dive into it first thing in the morning was a very difficult task. Continue reading

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Just here

I must admit that being focused on this present moment is not as easy as I thought.

My mind is wandering more than ever and trying to keep it in this local reality is costing me an extra effort today.

Too many things are trying to keep me from “being here” and that is so interesting to observe, because I am trying to ask myself why, something apparently so simple, is so complicated today.

Probably paying so much attention to my thoughts today is making the task more difficult or, struggling to keep my mind relaxed is what is causing the opposite effect. But nevertheless it is so fascinating to observe this process from the inside. Continue reading

It’s ok (Note to self)

It’s OK to wake up one morning feeling drained, without your usual joy of life on and to decide in that very moment to take the day off. Just to gather enough strength to carry on with your journey.

It is valid to decide today not to feel gratitude for the good things you have got and, to let your heart feel that nostalgia for the days and people who are no longer here with you.

It is acceptable to decide to let anger and sadness to fill your heart and soul for a while because those feelings are a part of your human nature and have a reason to exist in you. Continue reading

Leaving behind…

After a long period of hardships in your life. After all the hard test have been overpowered, the most difficult thing is to leave those bad feelings behind.

Getting over a bad experience does not mean that you have to pretend the harm never existed.  It just means it is no longer directing your life.

I know there are things you will not be able to forget, but at least take the power you once gave them to guide the course of your life for a while and, retake it once more.

I once thought I was not good enough and, that I did not deserve to be happy and prosperous and those thoughts governed my life for a long time.  After discovering that there was no external person nor influence to blame, I decided to take that power back and manage it myself to direct it to more fruitful endeavours. Continue reading

Inner wisdom II

Inner wisdom comes not only in the form of theory or intellectual knowledge. It is a more profound concept.

We can say it is a part of our inner baggage, a set of tools that travel with us all our life and constantly updates with the help or our experiences and tests in life.

It means to be true to our inner being and apply those tools in our daily life. Continue reading

Distance

One of my friends is very small, or like she likes to say. “petite”. Her legs are short and she doesn’t walk very fast. So she was not used to walk long distances.

I am just the opposite, I have got long legs and walk extremely fast.

She looks everything from her perspective, obviously, so when I told her about my long walks, she couldn’t believe me, to her those distances are extreme. To me are normal. Continue reading

Go and find out

He was a very well known actor, films and soap operas were his main activity, but as happens to every actor one day the phone stopped ringing. For a few years he was able to survive with the money he had made with his career, so he had no financial worries for a while, but when things began to look difficult he got worried and began looking for new adventures.

We talked about his other artistic talents and I asked him about some paintings and sculptures he showed me many years ago, he used to love painting and carving sculptures and he was very good at it. Continue reading

Dare to explore

I had seen that subway passage many times, actually not the whole subway but the entrance. It seemed like an abandoned old passage with no way out.

Nevertheless the idea to explore it never actually came to my mind before.

Today I was returning from the studio and I was about to take my usual route when “something” made me stop and look at the stairs that lead to that subway.  I thought it might have been an old entrance for the underground station that is nearby.  But this unexpected hunch made me stop and go downstairs in a very strange way.  Continue reading