Problem creator

 

Every day we are exposed to lots of problems, with lots of variants, with lots solutions or decisions in front of us which lead to even more consequences.

Once we decide to deal with one of this “problems” we should find the root of it, and as a friend used to say: “Somebody must take the blame for this, and ain´t gonna be me.”

So, finding someone else to blame is not a difficult task. We usually do it immediately and automatically.

But then, finding a solution gets even more difficult. Linking the possible solution with our problem and expecting the one we blamed to take care of it, makes progress impossible.

But changing that mentality could benefit us immensely. Continue reading

Your mental image

 

They say that we should be clear where are we heading to, in order to get to the place, we wish to reach. And that is true.

I am sure, most of the time you leave your home with a destination in your mind. When you take the underground, a cab or get into your car, you have a definite end point in your mind. Otherwise you will make you and other people mad very easily. Especially cab drivers, they like to know where they will take you to, instead of driving around like lost ants.

In life, it is considered a good practice to have goals to accomplish, places to go and people to love. And that is good as well.

The real problem comes when you have a “fixed mental image” of how things should happen. Continue reading

Find your hope (Auto-reminder)

 

Do you remember that time when you thought everything was lost and there was not possible solution for that problem?

When you were a child, there were times when things appear impossible to accomplish, things like holding your spoon properly, reaching for a toy in a tall drawer, solving an addition on the blackboard while all classmates were watching you, and so forth.

Probably there were times when you felt hesitant to tell your parents you had broken their favourite vase by accident while playing with your ball inside your home. You just could not think of a way out of that situation, right?

As you advanced in your life, the tests became more challenging and the situations seemed harder.  But, when you looked back, you could see that you were always able to find a solution for every tribulation you found in your way, right? Continue reading

Be there

Sometimes we complain about the lack of support from our family, lack of understanding from our friends and acquaintances and how much we suffer our solitude, instead of learning from it.

When we are in such states of mind, we tend to look for someone to listen to us, we want to be understood, to be supported.

But as soon as we try to find those things in others, we face a cold wall of indifference and our loneliness becomes even bigger.

We all have been there. But have you ever noticed when you were on the other side? Continue reading

The puddle

After an amazing storm I was on my way to see a client trying to find shortcuts along the way to arrive on time.

I decided to go through a park I have never visited before but, it was on the way to my client’s office.  I was walking very fast and suddenly, after a curve, I found myself in front of a huge puddle.

At first I thought trying to jump over it or, slowly walk through it, but the image of a video of a car sinking in an apparently innocent puddle came to my mind.   This video showed a car crossing a seemingly inoffensive puddle in a street of a big city, but it seems it was covering a huge “gap”, the car unknowingly kept advancing and suddenly disappeared into the “puddle”.

The video did not show whether the driver was able to come out alive from there, but the image remained very clear in my mind.  Continue reading

Your silence

 

Nowadays, empty words are such a trend. Everybody has to say something all the time.

Even when they do not know what to say or they have no idea of what they are talking about.

If someone else is talking about something that happened to them the day before, people usually have an anecdote “more interesting”, “more frightening”, “more fabulous” to add.

If someone has some kind of illness or is going through a difficult time, there will always be that person who is going through something much more terrible than the others. As if demeaning other´s people problems and dilemmas was some kind of contest. Continue reading

Knowledge

When I look at the things I have been through so far, I realise that most of my experience, those things I consider as valuable knowledge, are mostly the result of painful events.

I am able to walk now, because many times I fell down as I tried to take my first steps when I was a little child, I got up again and kept trying to imitate those people around me who were able to walk without a problem.

Every fall was painful, but that did not kept me from standing up again and keep trying. And now, thanks to that I can walk for hours and enjoy it. Continue reading

Escaping

Escaping is considered a part of our self-defence natural system. It is usually called the fight-or-flight response.

According to this theory the sympathetic nervous system reacts to danger with a hormonal secretion of different hormones, amines and neurotransmitters (Norepinephrine, epinephrine, estrogen, testosterone, cortisol and others). Thus priming the subject for fighting or fleeing.

In these modern times, usually we don´t need the fighting part of the equation, (with the exception of big cities and problematic zones of course). So the fleeing part is much more active in some people. Continue reading

The equation

One thing I liked of mathematics when I was a little child, was that they were very precise.  2+2=4. That’s it. Straight to the point!

But then when math becomes more complicated things might change.

Do not worry I will not talk about math today, I am just sharing with you about an epiphany I had the other night, so do not expect a Math treaty here, promise! Continue reading

Anxiety

He usually looked so calmed and relaxed, I wondered sometimes if he ever got angry or nervous about something.

One day I heard he was going through a severe legal problem involving a money issue with his relatives. When I went to visit him he looked as usual, calmed and relaxed, despite the problems he was facing going to courts and having to deal with attorneys all the time.

At first I didn’t dare to ask him how he was feeling, since his attitude was clear enough as to see he was doing quite well. Continue reading